How to stop co-sleeping without weeks of tears?

Question

Bed sharing was lovely for ages but our 2.5 year old is a total starfish now and none of us are sleeping. I'd love our bed back but the thought of leaving her to cry makes me feel sick. Has anyone got them out gently?

Ryan · Answer

Slow and steady worked for us. Put her mattress on the floor next to us to start, then I sat by it, then over by the door, shifting a bit further every few nights. Took a couple of weeks and there were barely any tears. Only thing I'd say is don't get impatient and jump ahead like I kept wanting to, that's when it went backwards on us.

Kate · Answer

We sold the idea of his own bed really hard. Let him pick the duvet, made a big fuss about being a big boy, did naps in it first before we tried nights. Weirdly a teddy that couldn't sleep without him did loads of the work. One of us stayed till he nodded off for a while then we slowly stopped doing that bit.

Mel · Answer

Bit of a pick up put down mixed with gradual retreat here. Took about a month and I won't pretend there were no tears, but nothing like leaving her to cry it out on her own. Slow is the trick, every time I rushed it we went backwards.